A letter to God

Dear God,

We usually don’t talk a lot, not like this. But I have a question about something that I really don’t understand. My friend wants to die, you see. And I wonder, why did you make them like that? I get that you wanted to make a diverse world; I really do. I get that you created problems, so we could learn. I even get that you created cruelty. But I’m thinking and thinking, and I don’t comprehend. Why would you not grant someone the will to live? What purpose does that serve? Or are you trying to make a point by showing that there is no such thing as a purpose? How clueless!

To not give someone riches or to deny someone pleasure are both forms of understandable hardship. But to not grant someone the pleasure of enjoying a walk through the forest, of making the first cold dive in early spring, of listening to music; that is cold. To make someone ‘too tired to try,’ who’d deserve that and why?

Please explain this to me, God, for I do not see. I seek no pity but at least take them seriously. A reason for all of this would help. What sense does life make if there is no enjoying the uselessness? And why am I able to? Why do I deserve that, and they don’t? Surely I have done nothing special to deserve that. And they have done nothing special not to.

Did you create at all? Or did we make you? And did we then also create those without a will to live just because we could imagine them? But that couldn’t be it, for how could those who have the will to live ever imagine the ones without it?

So you must have done it. There is no one but you. How? Why? I keep asking because I need to know. You made me like that. This is not about me. Because I can handle it. I can even accept it. But that doesn’t make it right. Is it because to have those who have a will to live, you also need those who don’t have it? Is this a matter of duality? If so, we should thank them infinitely.

Is it really necessary, God? Couldn’t it just be a phase? Couldn’t we just use stories? Or are these the questions of a naïve child? If I’m naïve anyway, I’m just bluntly going to ask: Can you make it stop?


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